When the results are bad, I look for other things to write about. May I tell you about Rick Campbell? Richard Roberts and I are staying at his house. He is a clinical psychologist and an expat Canadian. We've spent a couple of days with him now, and have had many an insightful, happy conversation. In particular, I asked him about training minds for sports competitions, which he has done for Para Olympic athletes. He was forthcoming and didn't even threaten me with a bill.
Perhaps predictably, he sees the mental aspect of the sport of sailing to be the much neglected but essential focus for the successful athlete.
I had plenty of opportunity to use some of his suggestions on the first day. My starts were good, but my boatspeed was lacking. And I didn't go the right way. And I got to the starboard tack layline too early. And I did not fight for every inch downwind. And…and…and. It was not the day I was expecting.
Campbell says that when you have days like that, you must replace negative talk that inevitably tries to invade your thoughts with positive once. When you say you are going to do badly in a regatta (or, more likely after a day like I had, that you suck), you enliven the mechanism within you that is designed to carry out your commands and it begins the work of ensuring you will do badly (or suck). When you replace the negative talk with positive by saying something as simple as "I will do well today," the same mechanism, being a neutral servant, proceeds to execute the new plan. As the plan is more complex, there is more to accomplish and so success is not immediately guaranteed, but the point is, it begins to execute the new plan and make those things that are part of the new plan (success) accessible to you, which they were not when the plan was going in the other direction. It is as if you had decided to go to Winnipeg instead of Pickering. The mechanisms for Pickering (Failure. Sorry Pickering) were simple and you could get there fairly quickly. Winnipeg (Success. I know, I know.) is a distant destination and therefore the ETA is further away. But you have at least now changed directions and all the towns between Toronto and Winnipeg (Hard Work, Study, Practice, Wawa) are accessible to you. They were not when you were headed to Pickering.
So the mouth sets the agenda, but the mind continues to send feedback to you using thought and emotion. You do badly in a race and your mind sends back the message to your success-oriented mechanism, "Dude, you suck." A process begins within you, a dialog really, to sort out the contradiction that exists between what you have declared and your observer. It results in you being pushed out of your comfort zone. Then, a third voice enters the conversation; the Decision Maker or Judge, or Mediator (the name you use will depend on your character). He is the one that must decide between the competing interests and choose which direction you should go. It may decide for the plaintif, "Yea, I do suck. I will stop trying." Or it may decide for the accused, "You declaration is valid and will stand. You will do well, today."
Most of the time, the decision is between comfort and growth because, in the end, that is the fight most of us fight. We love our comforts, but strive for growth, and they are so often in contradiction.
I must confess, I say all of this in my own words. I apologize to Rick. He would certainly would have said this differently, and would certainly have a much more learned understanding of the process (He would at least use better cities for examples). What I've written is more what I have mined from our conversation than his thoughts.
There is more to say. And much more to the process that I have room for here. In fact, there is barely room enough in a lifetime for the implications of this struggle. And for some reason, that fills me with sadness.
And certainly, after such terrible results, this is what I have been dealing with since I came in to the dock yesterday. My best result was in the teens. Otherwise, I was midfleet. The guys I expect to be with are all consistently in the teens and, though I have seen them on the course, I cannot hold position with them and slide back though the race.
Am I going to have a good day today? Oh my. That, my dear readers, is the question. Am I ready today to face the demanding drive to the winter of Winnipeg, or settle for the relative ease of a comfortable drive to Pickering?
I am committed to provide sailing lessons with each entry to this diary but it is very difficult with so much discouragement, but I will provide some here as a matter of discipline:
- In the first race, the starboard tack layline was very close and I got to it too early because I did not look for the windward mark. The result was that, as I was back in the 20s, boat after boat came across to tack on my air and I had to tack away twice to clear it. Look for the mark before the start and judge you entry to the layline.
- Starting well is no guarentee of success. It is important to start well, but don't stop to enjoy your good start. There is plenty left to do to hold your position. I got a great start in the third race, and then failed to get to the right early enough to enjoy the fruit of it. The wind clocked and I was left to watch the starboard side of the course cross me at the top mark.
- Nothing matters without boatspeed. I don't know what else to say on this one. As much as anything, a lack of it destroys the mental game.
And now it is time to confess: 40, 51, 17, with 94 boats. Have a nice day.
Rob Koci races in both the Laser Full-Rig and Laser Radial fleets around District 3. Currently, Rob is the District 3 secretary and maintains a frequently updated race diary on D3Laser.com. Rob's home port is St. James Town Sailing Club in Toronto, Ontario.
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